Going to School in Underwear

Self-Control.  Does anyone else cringe at that word like I do?  Ew!  I don't have it.

Or do I?

In an article entitled "Self-Control: The Battle Against 'One More.'"  Edward Welch writes, "As the Hebrews were promised the land, but had to take it by force, one town at a time, so we are promised the gift of self-control, yet we also must take it by force."

The article is a great and weighty read.  I'd encourage you to read it--but my post is far less weighty, as I am simple-minded and struggling with this thing we call "self-control."

The Stupid Gift

When I was around 8 years old, I got this handheld football game for Christmas.  The details of who gave it to me are blurry, but I know whoever it was made a sacrifice to please me.

I was so pleased when I opened the wrappings to find something so exciting!  (How many of you remember how cool these kinds of games were?)  My excitement was soon dimmed with difficulties. I couldn't get the game to work.  Quite possibly, I had put the batteries in the wrong way.  

After many attempts to get my new toy to work, I finally threw it down on the ground in complete frustration.  "This gift is stupid!" I shouted as I stomped up the stairs in tears.

Mom to the rescue.  

"Honey, you shouldn't say that.  A great sacrifice was made to give you that gift.  It's not stupid, you just don't know how to use it yet.  Let's go figure it out!"  

Those are similar to the words I remember her saying.

Recently, I've felt the same way about the gift of self-control.  STUPID GIFT!!!!

I know I HAVE self-control.  It was given to me as a gift.  "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power and love and self control." 2 Timothy 1:7  

It's really making me mad though.  This gift, which was purchased and given to me at great sacrifice, is so frustrating to me because I feel like I don't have a clue how to use it.

It feels like I have NO self-control when it comes to: Eating.  Doing housework. Spending time in God's word.  Facebook.  (Shall I go on?) 

Honestly, I've been very singularly focused on my eating for SUCH a long time that it has defined my life.  Do you have an area like that?  Something you're working on so hard that everything else gets overlooked?  I was so angry about the gift of self-control as it pertained to my eating that I totally missed how it was being worked into my life in other ways. 

Thankfully, a friend challenged me this weekend to look for areas where the gift of self-control is charged up and operating in my life.

You Might Wear Underwear to School

Last week, my son decided he wasn't going to school.  In his own "stupid gift" moment, he decided that he didn't need school, he didn't like school and he quit.

Now, if you recall my post about Julie and the Whale, you will remember that, previously, these kinds of moments provoked an atomic bomb-like destruction in our home.  Mom (that's me!) would have been yelling, kids would have been crying, mom would have been slamming doors and crying too.  Ugly, ugly, ugly.  There was nothing pretty in our past in the file marked, "Difficult Mornings Before School."

This particular morning, though, no bombs exploded.  I remained calm.

To the child in his underwear, still lying in bed, I calmly said, "Your breakfast is on the table when you're ready.  We leave for school in 30 minutes.  You might want to be wearing something other than your underwear.  It's rather cold outside today."  He grunted and pulled his covers up.

Eventually he stumbled to the table, still only in underwear.  He ate his breakfast and I put his lunch and water bottle on the table for him to put in his backpack.  "10 more minutes," I said.

"I'M NOT GOING!" He stomped back up to his room.

At the five minute warning I made sure to include that I would not be coming home after I drop them off at school, so if he was planning to stay home, he would be home alone.  (I KNEW this would perk him up!  He would never want to be home alone!)  All the while, I remained calm--helping my daughter get on her shoes and coat.

Down he came again in his underwear.  He wanted to negotiate, but this topic of going to school was really not up for negotiation.  In the sweetest voice, I said, "I am leaving in two minutes.  You will have to go to school in your underwear today if you aren't ready to leave when it's time."  He knew I meant it.

You never saw a child get dressed so quickly!  By the time I was opening the door to leave, he was dressed with his lunch, his water, his school work and a coat.  He had no shoes and socks on, so he grabbed his crocs.  "Your feet will be cold today without socks, but I cannot wait any longer for you," I said.  He ran out the door.  

I guess having cold feet was a better choice than going to school in your underwear.

 I couldn't have imagined when I decided to name this blog "Going to School in Underwear" how absurd it would be to find a fitting image.  So, to avoid embarrassment for myself, I went with these Toy Story Underpants--which are not an exact replica of the underpants almost worn to school.

Hey, this was an area where self-control has grown in my life!  I DO HAVE THIS GIFT and IT ISN'T STUPID!!!!

I'm not sure I took it by force, like Ed Welch suggested in his article, but I see the growth and the changes since I wrote Julie and the Whale almost one year ago.

So, why am I sharing this?  Because maybe you have a "Going to School in Your Underwear" kind of moment that you're not seeing in your own life.

What area have you been focusing on lately that has made you really discouraged when it comes to assessing the gift of self-control in your life?  Now, take your eyes OFF that particular area, and look around you.  Where do you see self-control thriving?  God is always at work in our lives, my friends.  Look for it.  And be sure to share it with others when you see it.  We all need encouragement!