This blog post ought to make up for all the absent posts recently. Snuggle in and get ready to read my reflections of lessons I've learned in 2012. And these things only skim the surface.
My weight loss has been such a deeply personal experience for me that has
spanned far more than the last year of success. I’ve learned some things along the way that have been
very encouraging to me and may help all of us face our “fears” and move forward with
confidence.
1) We only have this moment. Think of what is TRUE.
Often, when traveling on a long hard journey (regardless of the area of sin
that is being addressed) we allow our minds to fret over the future. We
begin to materialize in our minds all the things that this journey will mean
for us. “I can’t give up cake forever.” “What if I lose the weight
and my husband still doesn’t find me attractive?” “Why should I even
start this journey? All of my other starts have only led to
failure. This time won’t be any different.” Etc… (And boy, is
that a HUGE “etc…”) But the Lord has only given us this moment. Philippians
4:8 reminds us: “whatever is true…think on such things.” Speculations
about the future are not true. Fears about the future are not true.
God’s word is “a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” We get to see
where are feet are—his word lights THAT for us. That light allows us to
not stumble on the rocks and the obstacles in our immediate path. And
through that comes a peace that we will be able to have a way of escape for
what lies ahead that we cannot see. A big part of my weight loss journey
has been thinking on what is true. That means what is true about my
current reality, what is true about my past, and most importantly, what is true
about God. Knowing Truth (capital T) is crucial to success in winning the
battle.
2) Run toward to prize, not away from the devourer. Philippians 2:12-14 says, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Yes, of course the ultimate prize is Christ, but hear on this earth there are things we can run toward that will inspire us to love Christ more and “throw off everything that hinders us and the sin that easily entangles us and run with perseverance…” So often, in the past, I was running from my sin. And there is, of course, a biblical principle in that. But just running from sin misses something incredibly powerful. We don’t have to run FROM, we need to run TO. This is the picture the Lord gave me through the words of a very wise friend. “Imagine you are in the woods and there is a pack of angry, hungry wolves chasing you. Your heart is pounding and you have one thing on your mind—you have to escape! But the harder you run, the more tired you get and the more doubt fills your mind. You stumble and get back up, legs weak and arms bruised from the fall. Now the wolves are even closer. Finally, you fall over a large log in the path. In that moment you realize, you’re not getting out of there alive. You can’t possibly do it. You are a victim of the devourers. You lay down and accept your fate. You will be eaten. Now…imagine a different scenario. Imagine instead that under the Golden Gate bridge there is a treasure box with your name on it. And in that box is enough treasure to afford you the rest of your life without any worries. It’s yours—for free. The only thing is, you can only use your feet to get there. In that scenario, you keep pressing forward, even if there are hard days. You take a rest and you get back up. You don’t stay down. You aren’t being devoured. You are no longer a victim. You are moving with razor focus toward one goal—no matter how long it takes you to get there.” That’s what it looks like to keep your eyes “fixed on Christ”—to run toward what He is calling you to do. For me, that looks like running toward health. Throwing off everything that hinders DOES mean eating a very particular way. (I saw your comment to Richard, and I do understand what you were saying…but for me, on my journey, I disagree. For me, Doritos do equal sin. “Everything is permissible, but not everything is helpful…” and Romans 14:2 says, “One man's faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.” We must follow God and know ourselves and our own personal weaknesses well.)
3) Throwing off means being FREE. When we are thinking on what is true and running toward the prize for which God has called us heavenward, then we can experience freedom. This is short and sweet—but my journey toward health has enabled me to worship more purely. There is no longer a vice on me that is creating a chasm between God and me. It is for FREEDOM that I have been set free. Christ didn’t die so that I could be a slave to another master. Man cannot serve two masters. But for a long time I was serving another master—food was controlling my life. I have not reached “perfection”—no way! But in the process, I get to experience a fuller intimacy with Christ. Another “lover” is no longer allowed in our bed. I am like Gomer, coming home to Hosea. PRAISE BE TO GOD!!!!
4) I am IN Christ & He is in me. For all the years I have heard those verses about abiding in Christ and Him abiding in me, I never really understood that until I started walking this journey and addressing my fears one by one. And then my sister gave me a little object lesson one day that changed the way I view my fears and temptations and my place with God. She handed me a paper heart and said, “Write Jesus on this and then put it in this envelope.” I did that and then I wrote my name on the outside of the envelope. Then she handed me a bigger envelope. “Write Jesus on this and put your envelope inside of it.” I did that and then was handed a the largest envelope. “Write The Father on this and put all of the envelopes in it.” She then shared with me that nothing gets to me that has not first gone through The Father and through Jesus and even when it gets to me, Jesus is inside of me. Such a simple illustration, but so profound for me. I don’t have to fear devourers. Nothing can harm me—for I am nestled in God and in Christ and Christ is in me. THIS Truth qualms my fears every day as they arise.
Okay…I could obviously go on and on. But I’ll end with this. I have found it very unhelpful to have a list of things to “do” and “don’t do” from man—whether it is in my Christian walk or in a particular area of struggle. (which, I guess is part of my Christian walk) What I have found extremely helpful is Truth. And I have found a very pliable heart when I have an ear turned to hearing God speak.
I don’t take pride in my body—except that my body represents something GOD has done in my life that is visible and tangible to others. If God can do THIS in MY life, then it gives people all kinds of HOPE for what God can do in theirs. And THAT makes the journey extra amazing. That God would use something that is such a weakness—something that had beaten me for so many, many years—to serve others and lead them to a freedom that means loving God more as well—well, bring it on!
I am a broken vessel, ready and willing to be used.
Thanks for the opportunity to share just a glimpse of my heart. This has, possibly, been the most important year of my life. And the best is yet to come! The race is not over. The prize is still ahead of me. And I cannot stop running!!!!!

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